Would you think success is defined by your child being a rich investment broker with 2 houses and a boat and 5 jet skis, even if they had to sacrifice their own family? Would you think your child is successful if they lived in a run down trailer with no electric or plumbing, but they loved their spouse and children more than anything in the world? What about if they were gay/lesbian? Would there be any way for you to see them as successful if you disagreed with the way they live their life?
I'm not sure how I would feel about that. I love my boys unconditionally. There is nothing they could do to make me not love them. They test my patience, try my parenting skills, and drive me nuts, but without a doubt, they are priceless and my love for them will never ever ever stop. I have high hopes for them, but lately I'm realizing that's MY hopes-theirs might be different! Seems kind of like a DUH moment, but I never thought about it before.
My kids are growing up into their own unique selves, and it doesn't always fit into my cookie cutter view of what I want them to be. They do things different than I would-but it's ok! Frustrating to sit back and watch, but....ok.
This is one part of parenting I never considered-the part where you let go and sit back and watch what they will do. I was so in the mindset of "protect them from this", "don't let them do that", "they need help with that, I can just tell", almost to the point where it was holding them back. I have Adam to thank for opening my eyes to the fact that I can't do everything for them forever. I have to let them figure stuff out. It's still a struggle, sometimes I control myself, sometimes I fail. But I realize that if my kids aren't doing and growing, they're faltering and shrinking, and no parent wants that.